Size 18 Jeans & Onward

I went clothes shopping yesterday and tried on a pair of size 22 jeans (I was wearing a size 24 at the time that were too big). The 22s were HUGE on me.

The saleslady was all, "you need an 18". I was all, "yeah right".

I ended up with the 18 (and they're a tad loose).

They were having a buy one/get one half off sale and I asked my shopping buddy if she wanted the half off ones because I wasn't going to get 2 pairs of jeans. She did.

BUT, then I thought, oh, shoot, I could have got a pair of size 16 because I'll be needing those.

And that's how I know this time is for keeps.

I have never been so confident, so sure in my life. I just know that I'll be in a size 16, 14, 12, etc. in no time.

It's fun and scary and thrilling and 40.5 lbs gone since November 21.

Onward. :)

Doing It

My beautiful friend, LL, sent this to me today.

And I say YES!

37.5 lbs gone since 11/21/11.

I'm so rockin' this.

Letting Go of Perfection

I'm going to Hawaii in a couple of weeks and I asked my husband (aka Shmoopie) this morning: "do you think if I planned it and made a conscious choice, it would be okay to have ONE shave ice in Hawaii?"

He basically told me that this weight loss journey is more about creating new habits - and in the past, I wouldn't plan, or think or make any kind of conscious choice. I would just eat whatever the hell I wanted, whenever I wanted.

This sounds simple. It is. But not easy.

Not for a perfectionist like me. BUT - this perfectionism is part of what got me here (m.o.) in the first place. I would think: "well, I can't do all that perfect {eat only healthy foods 100% of the time, exercise for whatever time/length "they" tell you to, etc. etc. etc.} so I just won't do ANY of it."

And I didn't. AND not only did I not do ANY of it, but it was all so overwhelming and god damned depressing that I just ate and ate and ate more.

And now, I'm doing the very best I can do, and planning ahead and making choices and getting that this is for life - not till I get to whatever weight and then back to the old ways. AND I'm getting that I can be healthy, make healthy choices and have a shave ice in Hawaii. I won't be beating myself up about it.

I'll be eating it while wearing my new bathing suit top that I had to buy because my old one was falling off - and my much looser than last summer swim shorts. :)

Aloha!

Patience

is so not my virtue!

I do an hour of Zumba, get in the car, look down at my legs and think, "what the hell? Why am I not smaller?"

Ha!

I so want the immediate gratification but I also know that I didn't eat one cupcake and turn into an obese person.

It sneaks up.

And so does the good.

I'm practicing the patience part.